Openers, Conversation Starters, Casual Introductions for Girls on Bumble

Bumble (along with Coffee Meets Bagel and Hinge) is one of the most recommended apps I suggest for clients to use. It’s a widely popular among guys and girls in the 25-45 year old range and effective for ages north of that in larger cities like NYC, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Chicago and Boston. 

How Bumble Is Different

Bumble differentiates themselves in a couple of unique ways. First it verifies users by requiring a real-time photo selfie that is then compared to profile photos. The idea here is to reduce catfishing. Secondly, it requires a double opt-in (mutual likes) in order for matches to appear and users to send a message unlike other apps that allow anyone (and everyone) to messages folks which can be exhausting. You control your matches with your like frequency. Thirdly (and this is the big one), women forced to send the first message to men in order for a conversation to get started.

The requirement for women to send the first message is a unique approach and the idea behind it is to give women control of who they wish to communicate with. For age, women have complained of unwanted messages and although that can still happen on Bumble, at least women can control who contacts them. 

24 Hour Countdown Clock To Send First Messages

There is a 24 hour countdown after you match to send a message to a guy before the match expires. Of course you can extend the window if you pay for the service or the expiring match pays for the option. Bumble is a popular app and the most popular guys on the app have their pick of the women so don’t assume a guy will pay for extends. 

Introductory Message Ideas and Examples

There are no character minimums for introductory messages and some girls have been known to start messages with a period ( . ), ‘hi’, ‘hey’.  Some guys on dating apps are happy to get any messages but if you are targeting guys who are more sought after, you might have to try harder than that if you want to stick out. 

The most common and bare minimum ways to start a message is to 1) use the guy’s name and 2) either acknowledge the match or say hi – “Hi David, glad we matched” or “Hey Michael!” A little more effort is suggested like “Hi Alex, what are you dressing up for today for Halloween”. This shows you are not copying/pasting a generic intro and secondly acknowledge current events or surroundings. 

I suggest even going further than that and starting a conversation by referencing a photo or something in the bio. Something simple like asking about a location of a photo, mentioning that you are going to or just came back from the same place or asking for tips about a place are all effective ways to get the conversation going. GUYS LIKE TO HELP OUT AND GIVE ADVICE. There is no need to pour your heart out and risk being vulnerable but girls should try to step outside of their comfort zone and make the first move to show intentions. 

Sometime guys’ photos and bios are vague, skim and hard to analyze. In these cases you can either skip over the guy and focus on profiles and users who do put more effort and creativity (which I suggest). 

Things To Keep In Mind

Men like receiving compliments just as much as women do. An introductory message should be customized, specific and shows some effort. Yes, I realize men have been known to be lazy when it comes to introductory messages on Tinder and other dating apps but Bumble is different. You are not just competing with time, you are competing with other ladies.

Why You Should Not Ignore Your Bio

You might think a great introductory message and good photos are enough to do well on Bumble but you should realize that empty bios and profile fields can hurt your chances for success. Often times women (for good reason) will limit information provided on their profile for safety purposes but this can be taken as signs of insecurity or not being committed to putting oneself out there and genuinely wanting to meet someone. It’s ok to change your name from Kate to Katie, put generic title vs actual job title, state your industry vs your company name but leaving fields empty or not including relevant information about yourself also limits the amount of information a guy has to draw from to respond or initiate conversation with you.

For additional tips on using the Bumble app, other dating apps like Hinge and Coffee Meets Bagel or tips on photos and bios, check out my blog: https://eddie-hernandez.com/blog/