Current Trends In Dating: Dating App Trends, Popular Trends On Hinge, Bumble, Tinder; Date-Me-Docs, Social Clubs – Modern Dating Culture, 

When it comes to dating, there will be ebbs and flows with experiences, profiles, dates and more. Below is a running list of current trends, what to look out for, common terms and slang as well as behavior to be on the lookout for.

Some of these will eventually enter cliche and generic status on dating profiles but are relatively new but not necessarily unique or worth using in a dating profile. For now, get a feel of what to expect, encounter and deal with when dating these days and some hope and optimism for those that plan to take dating seriously.

Related readDecoding Dating Profiles

 

Modern Dating Trends, Culture: Why Is Modern Dating So Hard?

Modern dating is worse than ever. People are outsourcing their dating efforts to ghostwriters, bots and matchmakers. Too many people are relying on apps and not meeting people organically. Social and communication skills are regressing thanks to technology, covid, WFH, loneliness, rising cost of living, work-life balance and recession worries.

Above that, people are dabbling in dating apps. Low-effort, just seeing what’s out there, listing Instagram handles is now the status quo. People are afraid and/or lazy to put themselves out there, be vulnerable, take risks, work on themselves or treat dating seriously.

Online dating is not easier than meeting people offline. You can create a dating profile from your toilet seat yet that doesn’t mean you are doing it right, will have success or be happy. Dating apps give lots of lonely people false hope as they are only intended to be used lightly in addition to meet people offline.

Luckily, there is a movement to also get off the apps and meet people offline like at bars, cafes, events, classes and more.

Related read: Dating Is A Full-Time Job, Dates Feel Like Interviews

Online Dating Trends – Expectations, Etiquette & Dating App Culture

Getting matches but matches don’t send a message

Matches are slow to reply

Matches unmatching after date is planned (to avoid being reported, free up queue etc>0

Matches send short answers

Matches don’t ask questions

Matches don’t ask for dates

Ghosting on dating apps

Revenge blocking – getting people banned on sites

Ghosting after first dates

Coffee dates

Video calls/phone calls before a date

Low-key first dates

People who would rather pay for premium, boosts rather than work on themselves. These people are looking for hacks and shortcuts rather than look at themselves in the mirror to assess what they are doing wrong.

Travel mode / tour guides – lots of people are using apps passing through town whether in town for a period of time for work or seeking something casual or seeking tour guides

Sober dates – this is both in terms of those that do not drink or want to drink less.

 

Online Dating Advice For Women

Screening Profiles, Why Don't Guys Reply, Low-Effort Messages, Overwhelmed w/ Matches, Signs He's Not Into You, What Your Dating Photos Signal, Coffee Dates, Lying About Age, 'No Hook-ups' In Profile & More

Dating App Trends, Online Dating Trends

Unfortunately, some trends are becoming more and more common as message boards like Reddit are highlighting and encouraging bad behavior.

Hi/Hey

How Are You

How Is Your Day/Week/Weekend 

Not on here much (IG/Snapchat/WhatsApp account)

AI Photos – this goes beyond filtered/photoshopped photos but completely digitally created photos using existing photos/headshots and making various photos out of them i.e. in a suit, at a bar, etc.

Chatbots – chatbots are being used to generate dating profiles and to communicate with matches on dating sites. Chatbots are becoming more and more popular and are replacing ghostwriters or professional dating profile writing services.

Fitness Dating Apps – this is something people are searching for but it is not needed if you learn to screen profiles on main apps and swipe left on profiles that don’t meet your interests. If you don’t have enough people in your area, exercise, eat well, make yourself more interesting/attractive, stop using apps or just move.

50+ Age Group – While this is the fastest growing demographic on dating apps, it is still a small segment (the growth rate focuses on % growth which calculated from a small starting base).

Related read: Decoding Dating Profiles 

Using Dating Apps While Traveling, Bumble While Traveling, Hinge On Vacation

Thanks to WFH and also increase travel opportunities, people are using dating apps while traveling. Thanks to travel mode on Bumble as well as GPS based location functions, the goal for apps is inflate dating pool as much as possible. Thank you monetization and greed!

 

Online Dating App Hookup Culture, Why Is Hookup Culture Normalized?

Yes, some people use dating apps to date casually or hook-up event. Others use them for travel guides. A lot of people were lonely for 2-3 years during the pandemic. People have needs. Similarly, things like open-relationships, poly lifestyles and throuples have become mainstream.

Related read: Is Bumble A Hookup App?

Bumble Dating Profile Example, Male, Female, Bumble Bio, About Me

Dating Profile Trends – Men; Bumble Dating Trends, Hinge Dating Trends

BJJ

Krav Maga

Work in tech

Entrepreneur

Whisk(e)y

Craft Beer

Mezcal

Boba

Down To Earth

Nice Guy

Sarcasm

Anime

Together we could ruin each other’s lives

Uber-rating

ENM / Open-Relationship / Ethically Non-Monogamous

Will not respond to hi/hey messages

My love language is Succession Quotes

Related read: Biggest Mistakes Guys Make On Dating Apps 

New Blog - Modern Dating By Eddie

This blog is for those that are new to dating, have little experience dating, are confused by ‘the rules’, keep making the same mistakes or are frustrated with dating in today’s culture.

Dating Profile Trends – Women; Bumble Dating Trends, Hinge Dating Trends

Spicy margaritas / spicy margs

Mezcal negroni

Espresso martinis

Casually looking for something serious

White Lotus them song

Fitted sheets / clean sheets

ENM (Ethically Non-Monagmous)

Partnered

Global Entry + Clear

# of Countries visited

No Trump supporters

No hookups

Can’t see likes so say hi

Dog & I are a package deal / dog-mama / fur-mama / must love dogs

Will stop to pet all dogs / will like your dog more than you

Good vibes only

My kid(s) mean the world to me / my kids come first

Resy reservations are my love language

Seeking +1 For Weddings

Looking to replace (x) as emergency contact

Related read: Biggest Mistakes Women Make On Dating Apps

Toxic Dating Culture, Dating Apps Are Toxic, Online Dating App Accountability

Dating apps have made it easier to ghost people, harass men and women, target lonely folks, gaslight unsuspecting individuals and wreak havoc on mental health and safety. Anonymity on dating apps and ambiguous and non-existent reporting features make it hard for people to report others on dating apps.

If you suffer from low self-esteem, depression or loneliness, do not use dating apps. People lie about their intentions. People are too trusting on dating apps. Criminals prey on vulnerable communities rather easily by analyzing their profiles, photos, and outlook on life.

The types of toxic people on apps are:

-narcissists

-sociopaths

-catfisher – uses other people’s photos, uses AI generated photos, uses old photos, uses photos that were filtered/photoshopped or lies about their hair, height, appearance, hair or other feature.

-jekyll & hyde aka the nice guy – this person acts nice and then flips out when you cancel a date or don’t want to give out your number, leave a date early or don’t want to go on a second date

-depressed/crying/lonely

-negging/manipulators

-stalkers

-low-effort/submariners (these people come and go; hot and cold, make plans and then cancel)

Related read: Psychological Effects Of Dating Apps

Why Is Modern Dating So Hard? Is Dating Actually Harder Now?

There are many reasons why modern dating is so hard. Too many young guys use apps rather than meet women offline, in person. Men have smaller social circles than ever before. Men are also more comfortable being alone and are ok with chasing women out of their league rather than focus on women closer to their age.

More and more women are outpacing men in advance degrees and thus have more options. Women are also more likely to not get married or have kids on their own than put up with dirtbags. Too many young women date older men and set a trend that is hard to undo.

Similarly, too many people have become isolated, lonely and regressed in social skills. Cost of living (and dating has risen), and work-life balance is harder to achieve. The older you get, the easier or harder dating will be depending how much you work on yourself, how much you are able to dedicate towards dating. Some people become more confident, interesting, charming and marketable with age, while some become less desirable.

There are too many people who don’t know what they want out there, and not enough people report bad behavior/people to permanently kick people off apps. Apps need to do a better job of keeping people off apps that violate their TOS. People need to use apps sparingly rather than use them for all or even most of their dating effort.

Related read: Modern Dating Terms

Date-Me-Docs: What Are Date Me Documents, Date Me Doc Database

I was interviewed by Livia about this trend for the NYT in 2023 but the interview was not published. Essentially, people are creating docs via Google docs, Notion, or even websites and sharing them on social media or through directories. The goal is to take a passive roll in their dating lives but putting this doc out to the universe like a newspaper ad and see who responds.

The trend started as a result of dating app fatigued but in my opinion, this is a rather lazy approach. It deflects blame for bad choices with swipes, messages and matches and leaving it up to chance to see who contacts you. The same people who use these docs are/were likely on apps – what makes them think anything will be different?

These docs are loosely organized (if at all) and contain the same info as dating apps. Sure, apps limit space you have to write about yourself but don’t blame the apps for that – that is on you to be creative, resourceful and not waste space i.e. stating you are tall in your bumble bio even though height is a field, listing your love of doggos in photos, prompts and bios etc. 

 

About Eddie Hernandez

Eddie is a dating coach for men & women in San Francisco (clients in NYC, LA, Chicago, & beyond ), as seen in the NYT & Bumble). He helps w/ profiles, photos, wardrobe, messaging, date ideas, red flags, lifestyle choices, hobbies, grooming/hygiene, communication, social skills & offline efforts.