Dating App Photo Tips For Guys
After years as an online dating photographer and consultant for clients in the San Francisco Bay Area and across the world, I have seen some pretty cringeworthy photos used by guys on dating profiles. After much press and coverage you would think guys would learn but no. Open any dating app today and you will see some things you cannot unsee.
Seems obvious but no. Many guys have facial expressions that seem very intense, appear dark, look creepy, lack enthusiasm or are just unflattering. Smile or laugh too hard and you might reveal a double chin, see the back of your tonsils or highlight your nose hairs. Not smiling well enough might suggest constipation, food coma, anger, sadness or despair. Finding the right balance is key. Surrounding yourself around close friends, family members, pets or activities, passions, hobbies can perk you up naturally.
Look at the Camera
Too often, men don’t like their smiles or they think their smiles make them look less masculine (this could not be further from the truth). One way men have tried to look more interesting or masculine is looking away from the camera. Side (also known as profile) photos, photos from behind, photos covering the face dark shadows, hoodies and hats all hide the face. Women want to see how you look. Looking away can suggest insecurity, trying to hide a facial feature or lack of confidence. Own your look, look in the direction of the camera but don’t look too intense (mean look, big eyes etc.). The occasional photo looking away naturally can be effective but a series of photos looking away can suggest something more going on.
Avoid Trying Too Hard
Many guys try too hard to illustrate strength, accomplishments or wealth. Don’t do this. Photos like this suggest insecurity, one-dimensional lifestyles and inability to be bold, unique and comfortable in your own skin. Spend 5 minutes on any dating app and you will find photos posing next to vehicles, photos with guns, photos at the gym, photos flexing, photos with luxury accessories, photos from expensive restaurants, lounges, bars, hotels. One photo will not hurt you significantly but a theme of similar photos will make it obvious you are trying to cover up some emotional intelligence, personality or social skills.
Background Locations and Environments
You don’t need to have epic photos all over the world to seem interesting but ignoring the backgrounds can be a self-sabotaging effort. If all your photos are taken at your apartment (hallway, bathroom, bedroom, living room etc.) that might suggest a lack of social life, lack of friends or lack of desire to leave your home. Everyone loves the occasional lazy morning, occasional Netflix binge but a theme of home photos can paint an unflattering picture.
Spend 5 minutes and you will find no shortage of bed selfies, gym selfies, apartment hallway selfies, bathroom selfies, car selfies etc. I understand that it’s hard to get good photos of yourself but littering your profile with selfies is not only cliche but suggests lack of social circles or close relationships or fear of asking photos to take photos. Nothing wrong with this but dating apps that train users to make quick decisions based on limited data points will make it tough for you to succeed. Seek out events with photographers, ask a stranger to take a photo, use a tripod with timer, get friends, family members or a professional photographer to help out.
Many guys on dating apps are looking to get that edge when it comes to their profiles. Sole inserts, misleading photo angles, old photos (more than 3 years old or those that don’t reflect how you look today), hat-fishing (using hats in all your profiles to hide baldness), photoshopping images, dog-fishing (posing with dogs that are not yours) are all techniques guys use to gain an edge. If you manage to succeed in your photos, you will likely not succeed going from date #1 to date #2. Be honest with yourself – work on self-improvement (exercise, eat well, be more social, research hair regrowth supplements). Many guys never solicit third party advice on their photos, app choice, bios – don’t be this guy. Get help. There is an inherent bias when it comes to perception and guys can get all the help they can use.
It’s not helpful to have good photos but also look good as well. What you wear is just as important as your expressions. Many women like to see a range of looks to show physique, give an idea of how you dress up for an event as well as how you look when you roll out of bed. Having good attire is crucial for not only showing versatility but providing insight into style, personality and appearance.
Make sure your clothes fit. Baggy items can make you look bulky, heavy. Wearing all dark colors can make you seem dark, distant, unwelcoming. Wearing graphic comic book t-shirts can make you seem childish, immature. Wearing sports items can suggest you will be glued to the TV all autumn during football season. One photo here and there will not hurt but multiple examples can suggest a lifestyle.
For examples on outfit inspiration, check out my Pinterest Board for men’s fashion.
Now that you have some guidance around taking good photos, be sure to make sure your bio, prompts and answers don’t go ignored. Check out this post on how to write a good dating profile bio. No matter how great your photos are, a bad bio and offset any advantage you have in your photos over others.
For additional tips about dating apps, profile photos, bios, prompts, check out my blog.