Should I Hire A Matchmaker? What To Ask Your Matchmaker, Do Matchmakers Work? Pros & Cons Of Matchmaking Services
Many people are frustrated with lack of success on dating apps while others are concerned about privacy that they have begun to explore matchmakers as a possible alternative to meeting people offline. Shows like Millionaire Matchmaker on Bravo and Indian Matchmaker on Netflix have popularized the industry and made it mainstream.
Before you get sucked into these high-powered sales pitches by people are contacting you at your most vulnerable time in your life, take a break, be patient and be sure to get the right info before investing your time and money.
Related read: Online vs Offline Dating – Which Is Best For Me?
Personal Matchmaking Services, Confidential, High End Matchmaking Services
As a dating consultant (featured in the NYTimes article below), I have helped clients navigate the dating waters whether it’s deciding between dating apps, screening matchmakers, improving offline dating skills and updating style.
Understanding the pros and cons, limitations of each service is key to increasing chances for success. Knowing the trade-offs being efficiency, privacy, cost and transparency is helpful to know before spreading thousands of dollars or wasting years of your life swiping mindlessly.
Related read: Dating In Silicon Valley | Seattle | Austin | Los Angeles | NYC
NYTimes-Matchmaker-Article
How Do Matchmaking Services Work? Are Matchmakers Effective?
Every matchmaker is different in terms of monetization efforts with some charging men only, others charging women only wither others charging everyone they work with. Some matchmakers charge a flat fee while others charge a subscription.
Some matchmakers let you see the person’s photo, profile while others do not let you see the person until the date.
A number of matchmakers reach out to people directly offline, online or even on dating apps to get single people registered on their platform as a free member. This is done to create a supply side of single people from which they are recommended to paying clients.
Not everyone is single as it is hard to update records and sometimes single folks are asked to go on dates as favors for matchmakers to go on practice dates (whether the paying client knows about this is not known).
Some matchmakers require feedback on dates (paid customers) while others will not allow customers to cancel or not go on a date.
Matchmaking services can work but knowing what to expect, how to negotiate and how to approach them is key. Similarly, if you have unrealistic expectations, lack of patience, poor skill sets, bad hygiene, or are creepy, matchmaking services may not work for you.
Related read: Are You Ready To Date?
How Much Do Matchmakers Cost? Are Matchmakers Worth The Money?
Fees can range from $2-$5k to upwards of $50k-$500k or more depending on specific preferences i.e. age, ethnicity, career etc. It’s not unheard of to have over the top requirements including bust size, waist, ethnicity, height, and more.
Some matchmakers charge a subscription fee and provide a certain number of dates per month. It’s best to review the fine print before you sign anything as legal recourse is hard to come by after the fact.
Depending on your time, availability, money etc. matchmakers can be a good investment. It’s the reason why wealthy people pay others to do things for them that they can do quicker, faster and cheaper (time is money for them).
Related read: Dating Apps For Career Professionals/Educated Professionals
Matchmakers Who To Trust? Matchmaking Services Reviews, How To Find A Matchmaker
Many matchmakers use internal services or more 3rd party services like Trustpilot. Trustpilot is a service that has come under the microscope for the nature of the reviews, you can read more about that here.
Yelp and Google are generally more trusted but even then there are a few things to keep in mind. Yelp reviews are more likely to be removed than Google reviews for various reasons (one should always read the filtered reviews on Yelp at the bottom).
It’s important to make sure services has an adequate number of reviews i.e. 25 or more and it’s also important to analyze the reviewers’ profiles to see if they seem suspicious (look at the example below).
Many offer generic, vague reviews while others are not even paid members and have a vastly different experience than what a paid customer would have. Others offer reviews based solely on singles mixers which again, offer no insight into actual matchmaking services.
A few provide false claims suggesting dates would be interested in relocating or traveling for dating when this is not the case. For this reason, matchmakers in smaller, remote areas should be approached with extreme caution.
Avoid ConsumerAffairs.com reviews!
Be sure to note the names on the reviewers, details/specifics (if any).
What To Know Before Signing A Contract With A Professional Matchmaker
Never rush to sign a contract. Terms are flexible, can be negotiated.
Continue reading here.
Should You Hire A Matchmaker?
Before you throw down $5k, $25k or $100k on a matchmaker, read this. Questions to ask, what to know before you sign any contract, and more.
About Eddie Hernandez
Eddie is a dating coach for men & women in San Francisco (clients in NYC, LA, Chicago, & beyond ), as seen in the NYT & Bumble). He helps w/ profiles, photos, wardrobe, messaging, date ideas, red flags, lifestyle choices, hobbies, grooming/hygiene, communication, social skills & offline efforts.