How To Get More Matches On Hinge, Bumble. How To Be More Successful on Dating Apps: Tips, Tricks & Advice on App Choice, Bios, Prompts, Answers, Photos & Messages
If you have spent any time on dating apps or have friends, colleagues or family members who use dating apps you should be familiar with one of the biggest frustrations: lack of likes and matches. This is mostly an issue with men on dating apps due to gender ratios on most apps but it also has to do with the user experience on the apps themselves. I have seen people automatically spin their wheels and try ineffective tactics like boosts with no luck.
Why Am I Not Getting Any Likes On Dating Apps: No Likes On Tinder, Hinge & Bumble
Chances are there are some self-sabotaging items on your dating profile whether it’s an unflattering photo, not enough photos, no full body photos, inconsistent looks on photos, lack of smiles, lazy bio / answers to prompts, no close-up photos or perhaps it’s a wrong app choice or lack of effort on your end (not sending out likes or not sending comments along with likes on apps like Hinge).
One should follow the follow the golden rule of dating apps: you are only as attractive as your worst photo. Don’t surround yourself with cheerleaders all the time (those that tell you want you want to hear and lack the ability to be brutally honest with you).
Get unbiased feedback on your appearance, grooming habits, wardrobe, facial expressions, app choice, dating app strategy and timing. You could be on an app meant for younger folks, you could lack realistic expectations or you could not be receive likes because you have not been proactive with sending likes and messages.
How To Stand Out, Get Attention On Dating Apps Like Bumble, How To Get Noticed On Hinge
There are a variety of ways you can improve your chances for success on dating apps and I have outlined a many ways below. Focusing merely on one or two different methods is not enough. Dating apps are competitive and with endless profiles a few swipes away you need to put your best foot forward with your app choice, profile, bio, photos, prompts, answers and messages.
Limited Time Special On Dating Profile Critiques!
Why Am I Not Getting Any Matches On Tinder, Bumble?
There is a lot of bad dating advice out there. Some people get bad advice from pop culture articles, crowdsourced answers from Reddit etc. but most sources of these advice columns are people who struggle with dating themselves.
Most folks are not familiar with some or most apps, do not constantly research apps on the market nor do they talk to folks who use apps regularly both those who struggle and those who have had much success. Each app draws in different types of people – you can’t use the same photos, strategy on one app and expect to do well across other apps.
Additionally, some apps are more competitive than others. Bumble has better gender ratios than Bumble but guys can’t message first. Tinder has no height filter so you are able to avoid that hurdle in other dating apps like Hinge, Bumble. On apps like Bumble, a guy needs a great profile and photos (more so than Hinge) because they are unable to send the first message to women. On apps like Hinge, it’s all about strategy (age difference, radius, timing, like vs comment approach). Knowing the optimal strategy on Hinge can make all the difference in who is shown to you (and when) vs being seen by more people you are interested in.
New Profiles, Front-loaded Matches, Regression To The Mean
Most people get a good amount of matches when they start dating apps and after a few days, usually the number dies down. Most people can’t comprehend lead scoring when it comes to date leads.
Over time, fewer and fewer people will match with you because the app is looking to get your hooked early and then monetize your account down the road. Additionally, once people see your profile and provide feedback early on, there is a regression to the mean on how others perceive you.
When this happens you have to work on yourself offline and online to get more matches (photos, bios, prompts, filters, messages etc.). If you try to game the system and reset your account, you will likely get banned.
Dating apps are pretty sophisticated when it comes to catching people who try to create new accounts to get more matches (it’s more than just emails and phone numbers). I am familiar with the ways apps can detect such behavior but I will not reveal it publicly to alert creeps, reward bad behavior nor people trying to game the system.
Don’t try it or else risk getting banned and self-sabotaging your dating life.
Average Number Of Likes, Matches On Hinge, Bumble, Tinder… How Many Matches Is Normal? How Many Likes A Day Do You Get On Hinge, Bumble?
The average number of matches will vary by user. Typically you will get the most number of likes and matches within the first 2-3 weeks and then slowly or abruptly tail off. If you are attractive, a good height, have realistic expectations and are in a good area and appropriate age range, you should expect 3-5 likes/matches a day after the initial surge. Over time, you likes will likely come from new users on the platform as existing users will have already seen your profile.
Don’t worry so much about the volume early on, focus on the quality of profiles, conversations and dates. Likes/matches mean nothing. The biggest factor in your dating profile that will determine where a person looks at your entire profile or not is your first photo, main photo. If it’s not good, people will skip your profile. Make sure to avoid these photos in your profiles and particularly in your main profile photo on dating apps.
Dating Profile Tips: Appearance, Lifestyle & Emotional Availability
Before you start to analyze ways to improve your profile you have to look at yourself and see if you are ready, is online dating for you and ways to improve your yourself offline. Better photos, bios, app choices and messages certainly can help but offline efforts have more of an impact on your dating life than all those items listed.
Everyone can stand to improve their appearance whether is exercising, eating better, updating their bland, outdated, juvenile wardrobe, optimizing colors and styles to complement your skin tone, hair and body type, getting a new haircut or utilizing proper grooming techniques.
As people get older, some get too comfortable with their job, lifestyle, environment etc. and don’t make an effort to dress up, look good, or get fit. Online dating is competitive, there will always be someone younger, more attractive, more fit, better dressed etc. It is crucial to be ambitious, always work on yourself to put the best you possible.
Given the competition and readily available options comes with some warning. Online dating is rather anonymous in the sense that people choose to divulge only part of their lives. Using dating apps does not give a complete glimpse into someone’s life, character, intent and ambitions. Ability to read people, using good judgement, asking questions, being patient, not making excuses and having thick skin are all skills needed to be successful online.
Being physically ready is just one part of the equation when it comes to getting ready to use a dating app. Being emotionally available is also an important aspect to dating. That means being in a good place to put baggage behind you, not being defensive, and not talking bad about exes.
No one is ever in a perfect place but everyone should aim to work on themselves continually. Being recently divorced may hinder ability to be vulnerable or willing to take chances. Being hurt from past relationships might require additional time to heal. Years of struggle and frustration with dating might make you too jaded to give people a chance and a clean slate.
Dating App Choice: Tinder vs Bumble vs Hinge vs Coffee Meets Bagel vs Match.com vs OkCupid
Not all apps are the same. Apps favor some people more than others depending on age, location, gender, ethnicity, height etc. Using the app that your friend recommends or has the most users is not always the recommended choice of action. Understanding who you are and what you are looking to attract are important to figure out which app is best for you.
Apps like Tinder are known for more casual hookups but in some locations it is the only option in town. Apps like Hinge and Bumble are popular for young professionals but may not be the best option for those in remote suburbs and rural areas. Apps like CMB have a greater Southeast Asian profiles while Okcupid is geared toward more alternative lifestyles, quirky personalities etc.
Age, Location, Filters, Preferences, Deal-Breakers & Swiping Outside Your League
Even if you manage to select the best app for your lifestyle and demographics, you can still have a hard time getting matches. Using too narrow filters can limit the number of profiles you seek. Having an unrealistic view about whom you can attract relative to your age is also a common mistake people make. Focusing on people too young for you is something I see often on people’s profiles all the time.
Dating apps provide an array of preferences, filters and deal-breakers to help you narrow your search but it is a know fact people are more picky on dating apps than they would be offline. With that in mind, it is important to be honest with yourself when deciding what is a preference vs what is a deal-breaker for you.
Adding 1 year to the top end of your desired age range or subtracting 1 inch from your minimum height requirement or lowering the number of advanced degrees someone can make your life much easier if you let it.
While I don’t believe in swiping outside your league is a rigid or perfect rule it should serve as a guideline for navigating dating apps. If guys focus on girls who are only 1 inch below their height and above, they might be in for a rude awakening. Similarly, if guys in their 50s only target women in their 20s and 30s, dating apps might be a significant challenge for such men.
Online Dating Tips: Good Online Dating App Profile Photos
Dating photos are arguably the biggest factor in online dating success and experience (aside from offline factors). Many people are too shy or embarrassed to admit they are on dating apps and because of that rarely seek out help on how to improve their profiles and photos.
Professional dating photos are not needed for success (I myself would argue they are likely to hurt you because most photographers butcher the photos making them seem fake, retouched and deceiving). Good solid photos with smiles, comfort in your own skin, approachability and uniqueness are the simple ways you can improve your photos.
Using too few photos, too many photos, lack of smiles, using dark, distant, blurry photos, relying on outdated photos that no longer reflect your appearance or cropping people out are all obvious red flags when it comes to dating apps. Bumble suggests using at least 3 photos, I recommend using 4-6 photos (remember, you are only as attractive as your worst photo, choose wisely).
Be sure to work on your smiles and eyes. Big eyes can seem intense or a bit crazy. Relax the eyes and squint ever so slightly in your photos. Don’t forget to smile! Many people forget to smile and seem too intense or exert too much effort in their photos and seem Disingenous. Again, a relaxed comfortable smile is more attractive and confident than a wide smile.
When it comes to poses, fill up the frame, use more space. Don’t curl up into a fetal position or pull in your shoulders to lightly. Stretch out a bit – don’t slouch nor bring in your arms to your body too tightly.
Dating App Tips: Photo Captions Signal Context, Detail + Effort
So many people ignore this and it’s a shame. Laziness or lack of creativity – doesn’t matter. Captions should be used to explain where you are, what you are doing, who you are with etc. You can also add in what you miss about that moment, how you were feeling, or add some self-deprecating humor twist. Helping others out with a caption goes a long way (assuming your photos are good).
Online Dating Advice: Dating Profile Bios, Questions, Prompts & Answers
Bios, prompts and answers to prompts usually are ignored by most people and I see why – photos are the biggest indicators of success online. This doesn’t mean you can let this part of your profile go ignored. Incomplete bios, generic/joke prompts, lazy answers are always people measure someone’s maturity, intent, ambition and character.
If you don’t think so, then try it yourself. You may be able to get likes with joke answers and you might be able to get a few matches and hookups out of them too but if you want someone of quality and substance you will need to put in the effort, show sincerity and be honest about what you want.
For more detailed examples of what you should include in your dating profile bio, check out this post I wrote: https://eddie-hernandez.com/how-to-write-an-online-dating-profile/
Likes vs Messages On Dating Sites: Is It Better To Like Or Comment on Hinge?
You can tell a lot about a person and the way they initiate the first contact with you. Likes are quick and easy. They are also lazy and effortless. Always go with a message first. I often hear people say likes get as much success or more than messages – I do not doubt this but I will counter it by saying quantity over quality and these anecdotal observations assume you are a good writer. Most people are awful at writing thoughtful, creative, funny, interesting messages.
Even if you are a good writer, taking too long to respond or not being efficient in your messages to the point that you have to go back and forth too many times can leave people annoyed and impatient.
Communication skills are a highly underrated thing when it comes to dating apps. A lack of in-person feel or even audio communication leaves a lot of ambiguity through digital communication channels.
Biographical Data: Hinge Profiles, Bumble Bios
Somethings about your lifestyle will influence your abilty to get more matches – location, education, career, financial stability and tone in your bio and prompts will all impact your ability to get matches. Sounding lazy, using lists, low-effort and low-energy profiles are undesirable. Communicatiing that you don’t have roommates, like to travel, eat out at nice places once in a while all communicate financial stability.
Online Dating Red Flags: Guys, Girls To Avoid On Dating Apps
The above items are ways to improve your profile but some people still manage to self-sabotage their efforts despite the advice and help I provide. An inability to know understand and analyze items in a profile is somewhat subjective and some people need to be reminded of what are some ways they manage to hurt their chances of success. So for you, here are some additional things to look out for in your dating profiles.
How To Get More Matches On Bumble, Hinge vs Getting More Matches On Tinder
Hinge and Bumble are very different apps than Tinder. Different audience, different expectations, different lifestyles and different intentions. What worked for you on Tinder in your 20s will likely not work for you on Hinge or Bumble in your 30s. Those self-absorbed, cliche, modeling or narcissitic photos are more effective on superficial and naive/gullible and thirsty types on Tinder.
No Matches On Bumble: To Get More Matches On Bumble
Bumble is slightly more visual, superficial than apps like Hinge. It’s hard to get matches on Bumble with an average profile. Bumble doesn’t have as good a selection of prompts like Hinge does and Bumble does not allow men to message first so men need to have great photos, bio and prompts to stand out. It also helps to make sure you first photo is great as some women will not scroll past a first photo.
To increase the number of matches on Bumble, make sure you have realistic expectations with age, location, and lifestyle. Just because you are willing to date someone 50 miles from you doesn’t mean others are. Similarly, just because you think you can date someone young doesn’t mean they want to date you. Having good self-awareness and understanding your audience will go a long way. There are always exceptions to the rules but with dating apps, you have to play the odds.
Why Am I Not Getting Matches On Hinge: How To Get More Matches On Hinge
I will not get into the details of this strategy as it will ruin it for everyone else but let’s just say it’s important to have strict radius and age ranges on Hinge. Having them too wide will more likely invite profiles that don’t fit your criteria. Be honest with yourself and don’t go chasing people out of your league because the more you do that, the more you will get left-swiped and the less you will be shown to people you are interested in.
Also make sure you optimize your profile for photos, answers to prompts and fill out your bio. Lack of info or one-word answers suggest laziness or not that serious about dating. Similarly using just any photos can hurt you as people tend to judge others by their worst photo. With Hinge, there is more strategy involved to getting more likes and matches than with Bumble.
Should I Pay For Boosts On Bumble, Hinge Or Tinder To Get More Matches?
Boosts can artificially increase match rate by showing you to more people but often these are people outside your age range or interest levels. They are also likely to be bots that like every profile. Boosts do not make you more attractive nor more interesting. They are a quick, lazy hack that only helps attractive people and those with great profiles get more likes, matches.
How To Be Successful On Dating Apps, Strategies For Success
Next Read: How To Be Successful With Online Dating (exhaustive step by step checklist)
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Additional Reading: How To Get More Matches On Tinder, Bumble, Hinge
About Eddie Hernandez
Eddie Hernandez is a dating consultant & professional photographer based in San Francisco, servicing clients in New York City, Los Angeles, Chicago and beyond as featured in the NYTimes, SFGate, ABC7News, East Bay Express, Salon; contributor to Good Men Project, Plenty Of Fish and Meddle.
In addition to photos, he provides guidance around app choice, bio optimization, messaging techniques, wardrobe advice, date planning, screening profiles, ID'ing red flags, offline techniques for meeting people organically, naturally.
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