Best Dating Apps & Sites For Serious Relationships

Top Dating Apps For Serious Relationships; Is Hinge, Bumble For Relationships?

As a dating coach for men and women, I have spent years working with individuals to help them understand the ins and outs of dating apps, uncover blind spots, create better profiles and screen profiles and read people so that they can save valuable time while trying to find love.

One of the best articles I have uncovered is from the Atlantic talking about why finding love on dating apps is so hard – I recommend you read that. In a nutshell, it talks about how dating apps are a simple solution to a complex problem.

Think about it, aside from saving up for a home, career, health, career and family, a partner/spouse is arguably the most important thing you have to look forward to, and before you can find such a person, you have to date. Most people just jump into dating without any help, research, planning, feedback or coaching.

It’s important that you invest time, effort and yourself into dating rather than use dating apps as a shortcut or quick fix. Chances are, if you struggle with dating and meeting people offline, dating apps may not help you. 

Related read: Dating Apps For Open-Relationships, Poly, Throuples & ENM

Best Dating Sites For Serious Relationship – Best Dating Apps For Relationships

Dating apps are a tool to meet people outside one’s daily life, social circles and routines. The ease of which one can create a dating profile is so quick and easy, it presents a false sense of hope for many as they casually dabble with the app, upload photos without thought and swipe mindlessly for hours. It’s important to know this because the amount of effort on display is a key factor in determining intent.

Just because you are on a dating app, doesn’t mean people are on there to date. Some people are on there to scam you, some people are there because they are lonely and looking for companionship, some people are narcissists and looking for attention, some people are looking for something casual and some people don’t know what they want.

Yes, there are some apps out there that claim to be for relationships only or those seeking to date but what filters and barriers are they putting up to screen for people like this? Often times, it’s not much if anything at all. Part of the blame goes to apps but also people who use them.

Being too trusting, pre-qualifying people too quickly or ignoring red flags are an unfortunate repercussion of those on dating apps (especially if they are lonely, depressed or have a hard time reading people). Just because you have a profile and information doesn’t mean it’s exhaustive, complete, accurate or recent. People lie in their profiles and usually that is a sign of more lies to come.

Related read: Online Dating Red Flags

Is Elite Singles Good For Relationships? Is eHarmony Good For Serious Relationships?

If you Google best dating app for relationships or best dating site for serious relationships, you will get a bunch of useless articles and sites that rank well on search results. The truth is, there is no best app for all people and all backgrounds. Each app has its quirks and apps will vary by age, location, orientation, gender, lifestyle choices, ethnic background, height, appearance and more.

Some people make the false assumption that paid apps are better because they filter out people. This is not always the case. Sites like Match.com are bleeding users and not everyone is active on the site nor is a paid member (so they can’t read/reply to messages).

Similarly, sites like eHarmony and EliteSingles are a marketing move. I have never recommended these sites to anyone, ever. Sure, some people have found it useful, but there aren’t that many people on the site to begin with and the false sense of security it suggests makes it easy for people to believe everyone on there is looking for the same thing.

To find a relationship, you first must be ready to date. Not everyone is ready or knows what they want. Dating apps don’t guarantee anything and it’s important to be in a good place mentally so you can use good judgment, be patient and not overly invest yourself in strangers.

Secondly, it takes time. Imagine going to a bar and putting pressure to meet someone everything you go out – it would be exhausting. Like going out, you should focus on being the best you, enjoying yourself, your surroundings and people you are with. Not all apps are the same so it’s best to get advice from others, professionals with similar backgrounds and intentions.

There is a balance of letting things happen organically, but also putting your best foot forward. Be sure to see what your profile signals. Be sure to fill out your profile. Be sure to cut off time-wasters. Be sure to date on effort and present offerings rather than potential.

Related read: How To Be Successful On Dating Apps

Is Bumble Good For Dating? Is Bumble For Serious Relationships?  

Hinge, Bumble and Coffee Meets Bagel are the apps I recommend most but results will vary on demographics. Some people like Okcupid, Match, The League or The Lox. I have known people who have found their spouse on Craigslist, POF, Tinder and more.

People have different preferences. For example, some women are terrible at making a first move (Bumble). Some people hate the idea of no incognito mode (Hinge). Some people hate the idea of bots, scammers (Tinder). There are lots of bots and scammers on sketchy, niche apps but there are some on mainstream apps too.

Additionally, relationships take time. If you are in a rush, you can overlook great people. If you have attachment issues, you could be pushing away quality folks. If you have trauma you have not dealt with, you may not be ready to date and put yourself out there. If you live in the middle of nowhere, apps may not be a good option for you.

If you use apps for all your dating efforts, you might struggle as you can’t ignore communication skills, social skills, date planning skills, hygiene, grooming, wardrobe and the like. Dating apps are not shortcuts and they definitely are not ordering apps. They are introduction tools. If you struggle with making mistakes over and over again, it’s best to take a break and/or perhaps get some help.

Bumble is a good app but thanks to Incognito mode, travel mode etc. it attracts a lot of cheaters, married men, spammers etc.

Read: Bumble Location, Travel Mode

Is Hinge For Dating? Is Hinge Good For Relationships? Best App For Serious Dating

Hinge is typically better than Bumble for relationships but results will vary based on realistic expectations, photos, strategy, awareness of algorithm, effort etc.

Read: Hinge vs Bumble Comparison

Average Time Needed To Find A Relationship On Online Dating, How Long To Use Dating Apps

That will depend on a variety of factors like appearance, age, height, lifestyle choices, deal-breakers, hygiene, grooming, style, facial expressions, communication skills, job, education, voice, religion, politics and the like. There is no way to predict how long it will take. It could take weeks, it could take months or years or it could never happen. Read more about it here.

Best Dating App For Long-Term Relationships?

It’s less about the app and more about:

• Your ability to market yourself
• Your ability to use good judgment
• Your demographics, intentions and realistic expectations

Dating apps are merely introduction tools. It’s up to you to know how to use apps as you can find long-term relationships on any app. If you need help being more efficient, learning how to ID red flags and screen people, let’s talk.